Old Hillbilly Learns The Hard Way About Lighting Dynamite In The Outhouse

It wasn’t all that long ago that we didn’t have the conveniences that we have today. This could include everything from our TV set to our automobile.

One convenience that we probably don’t think about all that often is the toilet. Yes, it’s a rather strange thing to consider but honestly, where would we be without it? We’d be in the outhouse!

Perhaps that is what makes the following joke so amusing. It is about a couple of hillbillies and how they learned a valuable lesson when it came to outhouse maintenance.

Ma and Pa were two old hillbillies living out on a farm up in the hills.

Pa has found out that the hole under the outhouse is full.

He goes into the house and tells Ma that he doesn’t know what to do to empty the hole.
Ma says, “Why don’t you go ask the young’n down the road? He must be smart ’cause he’s a college gradjyate.”

So Pa drives down to the neighbor’s house and asks him, “Mr College gradjyate, my outhouse hole is full, and I don’t know what to do to empty it.”

The young’n tells him, “Get yourself two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. Put them both under the outhouse and light them both at the same time. The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse in the air. While it’s in the air the second one will then go off and spread the poop all across your farm, fertilizing your ground. The outhouse should then come back down to the same spot atop the now-empty hole.”

Pa thanks the neighbor, then drives to the hardware store and picks up two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse.

He goes home and puts them under the outhouse.

He then lights them and runs behind a tree.

All of a sudden, Ma comes running out of the house and into the outhouse! Off goes the first stick of dynamite, shooting the outhouse into the air.

BOOM! Off goes the second stick of dynamite, spreading poop all over the farm.

Then, WHAM! The outhouse comes crashing back down atop the hole.

Pa races to the outhouse throw open the door and asks, “Ma, are you all right?”

As she pulls up her panties she says, “Yeah, but I’m sure glad I didn’t fart in the kitchen!”


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