Few things tear out your gut quite the same way as being betrayed by a lover. This feeling is bad enough when you find out after the fact that a spouse has cheated on you, but most people can only imagine how it feels to catch them in the act. However, for those unfortunate enough to have lived through such an experience, there are just no words to describe the devastation. Cheating just leaves a hole in our hearts that never really heals. However, the cheating husband in this fictional anecdote came up with a pretty interesting excuse when he had to explain to his wife why he was in bed with another woman.
The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman. And was somewhat upset.
‘You are a disrespectful pig!’ she cried. ‘How dare you do this to me faithful wife, the mother of your children! I’m leaving you. I want a divorce!’
And the husband replied ‘Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened.’
Fine, go ahead, she sobbed, but they’ll be the last words you’ll say to me!
And the husband began Well, I was getting into the car to drive home and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn’t eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn’t eat because you’re afraid you’ll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away. Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don’t use because you say they are too tight.
I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don’t use because I don’t have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don’t use just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don’t use because someone at work has a pair the same.
The husband took a quick breath and continued She was so grateful for my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said, Please do you have anything else that your wife doesn’t use?
Source: Tickld